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Before I begin, I have a couple images to share... Here's my current desktop:
And this one is too fun not to share!
Ok. With that done, I'll write something.
For some random updates,..
Work is driving me up the fuckin' wall. Every time I start gagging from the too much on my plate another heapin' helpin' gets slammed on it. My reaction to stress has become to split early, come home, and crawl into a bottle. Writing helps work shit out, so would exercise, so would meditation. So nope. I come home, make a cocktail, burn a pack of fags, look at porn, and cry. I cry a lot lately. Apart from morning wood getting a boner is a miracle anymore. It doesn't feel like another round of depression settling down on me. I don't know what it is. I'm a creature of habit and ritualized behaviors, though, and I'm not liking where this lifestyle is heading.
There's a little house a couple doors down that's been for sale for forever. Last week someone started moving in... and suddenly I have rats setting up camp at my house. Only spotted 2 so far. One looks preggers. Found the other one in the zapper yesterday. Gotta get the one in her confinement. Maybe after she's dropped sprog she'll be on the hunt for food. They like kibble, and anyone who knows me knows I've got kibble out the ass. My mother usually mixes dry oatmeal and kwik-crete in a bowl for them, and provides a little bowl of water to help the process along. It's always worked for her. I prefer the zapper. If I have to get rid of them, it's the most humane of the choices. Tidy too.
[Tanner just drove by my house twice, slowing down at my driveway, then speeding off. I live in one of those places you have to want to go to. I mean there's no "I was on the way to...". Stalkerish? Yea, I guess. But he's always done that. He wants to know where I am. I caught him weaving (in his car) through the parking lot at work once and asked him point blank (but nicely) what he was doing. He said without batting an eye, "Oh, just seeing if your truck was there. Wanna go have lunch?" And the usual shit grin that always makes me melt, and he always gets his way because I always let him. How come me so stoopid?]
Numa is doing fine. Still watching out for another stroke. Have to be realistic but not necessarily pessimistic. He's actually on borrowed time. I understand that, but it won't things much easier when the time comes.
The LO and I are doing better than in a long time too. We very much need to work on our sex life, or what passes for one. I'm the one that needs to lead the way with that... I'll write about all that another time. I need to think it out, and here's the place to do it. By coincidence last night he and I watched The Loved One. If you like old movies, this one is a gas! He and I watched it a very long time ago and not since. It's only recently been available, and on DVD! He got a copy. He fell asleep half-way through this exciting nostalgia experience, but ok. BTW, since seeing it so long ago we've been referring to each other as the Loved One. (Hence my "LO"). The term (in the movie) isn't romantic. It's used excessively in the movie. If you don't know already, the movie is a satire -- cutting edge in its day -- centered around the funeral industry. Proto Six Feet Under I guess you might say.
So why Tanner should be cruising me today is a mystery. I'll write again this afternoon to explain that. I need lunch now.
~Seth~
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Have any comments you'd like to share?
[So far 0 smart ass remarks have been made.]
encroaching increase of darkness - 2008-11-02
Bones - 2008-09-20
random bitchings and musings - 2008-07-09
Man with Huge Cock - 2008-07-04
Eric and other crazy shit - 2008-06-29
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Thinkin' 'bout: Tanner
Dog(s) keeping me company: they're all outside doin' dog stuff
Current read: OT: Ezra