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Here's a better likeness to the Philip guy I've been mentioning (and will write a fantasy involving). It's still not spot on, but closer. I can't say what's off exactly. I only know Philip's physique by the tight clothes he wears sometimes, t-shirts especially, though I have enjoyed a basket view from time to time. The feller in the pic packs a nice piece if you ask me. Just the right length and girth for sucking. Looks like he might be driving a convertible too! For fucking (me), dunno. I'd need some serious relaxation first, but those shoulders beg to be held onto even if only for a dry hump! (even what Ryan used to call "a dressed rehearsal" when we didn't have time for him to nail me or even get naked together but could get a quick, clothed bump and grind)
Yesterday I wrote about some differences between Ryan and JWB, but those were all differences in character, not differences in appearance and behavior. There too he's a different person. None of JWB's character is appealing. None of his outward appearance is either. I noticed this in the fall and it's only gone downhill from there. I can see now how so much of my slow healing heartbreak is just from denial of this shift. I miss Ryan, I want nothing to do with JWB. He's not the same young man who wooed me into his toils.
Let's see... how do you write html for a table again? Screw it. Here goes something. You'll know who's who.
tall/slumped
confident bearing/baffled air
bright, bottomless eyes/glassy nobody's home
fun to play with hair/deloused look with widow's peak
sexy earrings/nothing
no glasses/dorky glasses
perpetual Mona Lisa smile/perpetual grimace
head high/face down
lanky but lithe/twiggy and flaccid
sports (soccer and baseball)/bible study
played bluegrass/plays 'praise' music
(On the mandolin I bought him no less!)
sneakers/top-siders
t-shirts/pullovers
boxers/(probably briefs)
casual in convo/stiff with big words
ratty old ball caps/nothing
That's all I can think of at the moment, but see what I mean? Who the fuck is this? Actually, everyone else I know who knows him is freaked out as well. He's alienated almost ALL of his old friends. (His new 'friends' are in his church.)
In describing all this I don't mean to come off as Ryan was perfect/JWB is utter asshole. Ryan had flaws too. He would snoop where he knew he oughtn't, borrow without asking (or telling!), expect to have his way all the time, what he wanted and when he wanted it, got scarily defensive or pouty if criticized, (he was scared to death of disappointing me), and worst -- I learned this later -- he lied to me more times than either of us could count. On the one hand my trust is the hardest thing to gain and he abused it (leaving me questioning virtually everything he ever said), on the other, all the lies I've learned he told me were as to protect me from getting hurt. One of his plusses was that he was very protective of me, and I mean violently.
So I can't hate him.
Gotta scoot. Gonna be late.
Major pic fest entry this afternoon! (proofing of this one too!)
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Have any comments you'd like to share?
[So far 0 smart ass remarks have been made.]
encroaching increase of darkness - 2008-11-02
Bones - 2008-09-20
random bitchings and musings - 2008-07-09
Man with Huge Cock - 2008-07-04
Eric and other crazy shit - 2008-06-29
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Thinkin' 'bout: Sam Adams Light
Dog(s) keeping me company: gonna be late!
Current read: 39